Choose Friends Wisely

I believe that at each person’s core we are meant for relationship. Even the people that don’t like people need relationship. Sorry people haters. Despite the fact that forced relationships are work, I have come to realize that life happens with other people.


Although I can sustain through my introverted self, I’m enjoying relationships that draw me out of myself, challenge me, calm me, and cause excessive laughter (the one coping skill I refuse to let go). In the middle of what I think is a difficult time in my life the people around me have picked me up from dark places more times than I realize.


Would I be the same person without these significant relationships in my life? Are we only as good as the people that surround us? If that’s the case, choose friends wisely.


“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival” -C.S. Lewis

The Chair Waits


I didn’t know a person could actually have a true breakdown in her 20s. I thought you would have kids and really go through being an adult before you could actually get to the point of becoming breakdown worthy. And even then, I knew I was immune to the breakdown I was destined to. Destiny won- or God.
When I read the excerpt below, it hurt, just like the paper towel I was using to wipe the tears flooding my cheeks. (Bounty really is the quicker picker upper.)
From Soul Care:

The chair awaits you at all times. Please, for your own sake, sit down. Breathe deeply. And let God love you.

The fight to health is much more difficult when you’ve gone on covering up and never fixing. What I am most confused about is I didn’t realize I was just covering up. Do I really believe that sitting in the chair will make a difference for my soul?
My personified tears would say ‘yes’… my ego would nod ‘no’. Tonight the tears win.

Standard disclaimer: I am not a crier but lately I have been. Working on that.

The Chair Waits


I didn’t know a person could actually have a true breakdown in her 20s. I thought you would have kids and really go through being an adult before you could actually get to the point of becoming breakdown worthy. And even then, I knew I was immune to the breakdown I was destined to. Destiny won- or God.


When I read the excerpt below, it hurt, just like the paper towel I was using to wipe the tears flooding my cheeks. (Bounty really is the quicker picker upper.)


From Soul Care:

The chair awaits you at all times.

Please, for your own sake, sit down.

Breathe deeply.

And let God love you.


The fight to health is much more difficult when you’ve gone on covering up and never fixing. What I am most confused about is I didn’t realize I was just covering up. Do I really believe that sitting in the chair will make a difference for my soul?


My personified tears would say ‘yes’… my ego would nod ‘no’. Tonight the tears win.




Standard disclaimer: I am not a crier but lately I have been. Working on that.

Breathe

I’m a little further away from where I’d like to be, but I’m working on getting the center of my life back to center.
Today I found time to breathe.
Breathe.
Breathing changes things.
My breath brought me back to basics. All I have to do is breathe. Listen for God. Follow God. Breathe.

Breathe

I’m a little further away from where I’d like to be, but I’m working on getting the center of my life back to center.


Today I found time to breathe.


Breathe.


Breathing changes things.


My breath brought me back to basics. All I have to do is breathe. Listen for God. Follow God. Breathe.

The Miracle Question


On the 5th failed attempt to find a distraction from connecting with my thoughts and writing this post, I decided to give in. Dear Facebook, you failed me. I’m never as strong and stingy as I think I am. Truth hurts.

So with that, I sit and consider the positive. I’ll start with a little background about me:
My initial desire to enroll in grad school was grounded in becoming a mental health counselor for high school students. Plans changed and I decided I wasn’t up for listening as a career. So I changed my major and the long hours of studying psychology was chalked up to a “Certificate in Professional Counseling”.
Every psych course I took had students examine what kind of therapy they would follow. The one that stuck with me was Solution Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT). In this model the counselor focuses less on the past and more on what is already working to build upon the current positive side of a situation. It’s looking for the bright spots in relationships and in life.
This brings me to today’s point: I wonder if people spend more time thinking about the past rather than searching for the glimmers that are already shining in their situation. I get stuck in yesterday. SFBT asks questions to challenge a person to look for what’s working.
So here’s the miracle question: If someone could wave a magic wand and you woke up tomorrow and found that things were the way it you wanted it to be, what would that look like?
What would you be doing? What’s working in your life?
It’s a difficult question when magnified out beyond a specific situation or relationship, but I’m reminded that focusing on what is bad doesn’t move me forward. My momentum comes from getting excited about what could be.

The Miracle Question


On the 5th failed attempt to find a distraction from connecting with my thoughts and writing this post, I decided to give in. Dear Facebook, you failed me. I’m never as strong and stingy as I think I am. Truth hurts.


So with that, I sit and consider the positive. I’ll start with a little background about me:

My initial desire to enroll in grad school was grounded in becoming a mental health counselor for high school students. Plans changed and I decided I wasn’t up for listening as a career. So I changed my major and the long hours of studying psychology was chalked up to a “Certificate in Professional Counseling”.

Every psych course I took had students examine what kind of therapy they would follow. The one that stuck with me was Solution Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT). In this model the counselor focuses less on the past and more on what is already working to build upon the current positive side of a situation. It’s looking for the bright spots in relationships and in life.

This brings me to today’s point: I wonder if people spend more time thinking about the past rather than searching for the glimmers that are already shining in their situation. I get stuck in yesterday. SFBT asks questions to challenge a person to look for what’s working.

So here’s the miracle question: If someone could wave a magic wand and you woke up tomorrow and found that things were the way it you wanted it to be, what would that look like?

What would you be doing? What’s working in your life?

It’s a difficult question when magnified out beyond a specific situation or relationship, but I’m reminded that focusing on what is bad doesn’t move me forward. My momentum comes from getting excited about what could be.

Blue Is For Roseline

Resilience. The ability to bounce back even after a child has witnessed killing without cause.
Disgusting. According to Invisible Children, an estimated 90% of the troops from the Lord’s Resistance Army (LRA) were abducted as children. The LRA is notorious for seeking out children who will be the most impressionable and mobile. The best age: 8-14 years old. Once taken into the LRA, children are taught one thing: to kill. Severe. The darkness of the world is shoved onto the most innocent in the world.
Even in the spaces, where I did not know that people could still live, there was a brightness.
Inspired. A blue bracelet to remind me of Roseline, one child who has been born into a 24-year-long war and humanitarian crisis in Uganda.
My problems of soul searching are dwarfed. I can’t help but ask myself what will I change because of what I learned today?

Blue Is For Roseline

Resilience. The ability to bounce back even after a child has witnessed killing without cause.
Disgusting. According to Invisible Children, an estimated 90% of the troops from the Lord’s Resistance Army (LRA) were abducted as children. The LRA is notorious for seeking out children who will be the most impressionable and mobile. The best age: 8-14 years old. Once taken into the LRA, children are taught one thing: to kill. Severe. The darkness of the world is shoved onto the most innocent in the world.
Even in the spaces, where I did not know that people could still live, there was a brightness.
Inspired. A blue bracelet to remind me of Roseline, one child who has been born into a 24-year-long war and humanitarian crisis in Uganda.
My problems of soul searching are dwarfed. I can’t help but ask myself what will I change because of what I learned today?

Searching for Significance


Forget the ladder. Keep the six-figure salary. What I’m searching for these days is significance. I want to be a part of something that is bigger than what I could ever do alone. Engage me. I’ll be a loyal part of the team. Build into me. I will deliver. I won’t let you down.
I just ask one thing- don’t break me with pseudo leadership practices. I’m too fragile and tired. I only have energy for health.
Give me a chance. I won’t walk on you or take credit for your work. I’ll be one of the best decisions you make.
I know that we can do way more together than alone. Alone doesn’t work for me. Let me on a team with the right vital signs and the sleeping side of me will show up. Promise.